Realizing something is one thing. Telling someone else -- particularly when that person is your advisor -- is another thing entirely.

Jane decided to practice telling her News. She started by telling her goldfish and progressed to trying out her new identity with friends. After building up some confidence, she bought a plane ticket and flew back to the midwest.

She found that it became harder and harder to remember what she had practiced the closer and closer she got.

Jane hoped that perhaps she would find a sympathetic wizard who would give her some courage. When this did not happen, she tried talking to other professors (many of whom were quite helpful). She called her advisor and set a Date.

There was no drama. No yelling. No attempts to bring her back. After all that buildup, Jane was pleasantly surprised to find that her advisor was patient and supportive. She remembered why she had chosen her advisor in the first place.

If Jane did not feel as though everything was clear now -- in fact, it wasn't -- she did feel as though she had a better understanding of who she was and what she wanted. She felt more confident in her ability to choose a slightly different path and act on her instincts. In the end, Jane found that coming out of the academic closet was much easier than coming out of some of the other closets that exist.

Jane realizes that everyone's situation is different, some harder or worse than others, and so she recommends visiting other sites for information and conversation dealing with these kinds of issues. (See our resources page for some links.)

Editor's note: As Jane is still in the process of making these decisions, there is no happy ending with horses galloping off into the sunset, etc. Not that there won't or can't be, you understand. As always, stay tuned.